It’s Omaha’s turn today. After a couple of weeks of talking about Omaha hi lo hands I’ve got a straight Omaha hand for you, or Pot Limit Omaha (PLO) if you prefer.
Now PLO is a game that I never play, I mean ever. The way I see it is that the people who have been swotting up on Omaha while I blatantly haven’t been have got the edge on me. Plus I like to play nearly every hand in PLO. And why not? If, like me, you can see straight potential in holdem with a hand like J7, just imagine how easy it is to make a straight with four cards? Hands like 258J don’t seem so bad then. So I tend to always lose at PLO and thus not play this form of poker any more.
But, in my insomniac state at 2.30am this morning I thought I would play some low stakes Omaha. I’d woken up because I was starving hungry and returning from the fridge I fired up a few tables of PLO between mouthfuls of cheesecake.
This is probably not the best idea for a confirmed hopeless PLO player – but action was required so action I was going to get. Even so, three tables of six handed PLO wasn’t enough action so I opened up a heads up table.
(Yeah that’s it – find the heads up players – they’re always going to be the weakest aren’t they? )
My opponent sat down with a blue and yellow flag as an avatar. Until Euro 2012 I’d always thought this was a Swedish flag, but I now know it’s a Ukranian flag, so it was time to do battle with some sneaky commie PLO heads up man. Bring it on Vladimir.
This hand of the week is the first hand of this session. Let it be said that I’m not particularly proud of this hand. I just want to tell you the story so you can ask yourself who is the bigger fish here – me or my Ukranian nemesis?
Anyway, first hand, the very first hand, and I look down at this:
Ac As Ad 5d
Ooooh three aces! I know having three of a kind isn’t the best because you are only allowed to use two of them. But in this case I figured I could beat him with one pair – AA. I’d never do this if we weren’t heads up, but when I raised and he raised me back, I thought “let’s do it” and decided to get the whole stack in.
I 4-bet and he dutifully popped me all in. Let’s see ‘em then. He showed the mighty:
Kd Qs 2h Th
Eurgh, what an ugly hand. The “dangler” in all its glory. When you’ve got three connected cards but the fourth just doesn’t fit in with those three, that’s the “dangler”, the 2h in this case. Unfortunately for him he only needed three cards to beat me: the flop was 8s Qh Tc and the 4s 7s on turn and river were no good to me. Round one to him!
On the fourth hand I had KK39 and he had A649 and he stacked me again cracking my top set with his gutshot straight on the river 5 Q 8 K 7. When I potted his raise on the turn he called it! And got rewarded. Awful play by him!
I mean I’m shit, but this bloke was even worse! So I was two buy ins down in about 60 seconds! Convinced what a terrible player he was I decided to battle on. But you know how it is. When you’re the one doing the crushing decisions become easier, you continue crushing, they just come to you and you make all the right moves. Poker is an easy game when you are two buy ins up.
And so it proved. About 150 hands later he was 6 buy ins ahead and I was playing like a total clown. Luckily I was only buying in for $20 a shout I suppose. But still, an impressive loss rate. $120 down and all I wanted was a bit of cheese cake.
I asked him if he knew what a terrible player he was, feeling it my duty to ask. He remained silent. My only salvation was that he started pondering every decision, even the preflop ones, for silly lengths of time. In the end I quit. He was just taking too long over every turn and I decided that actually thinking about decisions while so far in front was not in the spirit of the game.
“Hurry up or I leave” I told him rather rudely.
He did hurry up for a couple of hands…but then slowed down again. To be fair he was probably stuck on all his other tables because although he was lucky to have run into me, he was seriously bad.
“I’m not joking, last chance”, I told him and then I sat out.
“You’re 6 buy ins up and all I do is ask you to play a bit faster and you can’t even manage that!” I bleated.
“Stay”, he asked, seeing I was serious about leaving. Well I suppose he would wouldn’t he?
“No”, I said, logging off and returning to the bed I ought never have gotten out of.
I win, sort of.
So everyone let it be known, there are some really soft games out there. I could be playing in one of them.